Once a year I gather with my Sisters in the Deaconess Community of the ELCA for fellowship and for important conversations about the Community and our ministry in the church. These are some of my favorite days in the year. Gathering with women who are doing similar ministry as me, but more importantly are deeply compelled by some of the same visions and convictions as I am, is always encouraging and uplifting. I am always inspired by these women who are leading and serving as chaplains, teachers, musicians, synod staff, seminary staff, community organizers, youth directors, social workers, preachers, and more. Even as some move into retirement, I’m often equally inspired by the spark I see in them as they talk about the work they did and the work they continue to do.
This is my 8th assembly, and as I look back on the last 8 years, I am so grateful for the support and fellowship of these women. Some years I have showed up to assembly pretty empty inside, exhausted and overwhelmed from trying to make sense of life. These women have welcomed me, embraced me, and time and time again showed care and concern for me that soothes and calms my anxious spirit.
This year we gather at beautiful Heartwood Retreat Center in Trego, WI. The leaves are changing, the air is cooling, the land is getting ready for Winter. It’s a good time to be in Wisconsin.This year we gather to have some important conversations about who we are and where God is calling us to be. We will remember the lives of Sisters who have passed away this year, we will celebrate anniversaries of Sisters who have been in ministry collectively over 200 years, and we will invest a new Sister into the Community. And we will be doing our own collective soul searching as so many dynamics of change in the church, in the culture, in our own community are swirling around us.
This year we began our assembly in Minneapolis, at Augustana Homes, hearing a presentation about Elizabeth Fedde and the Deaconess ministries she was instrumentally involved with. These ministries included starting hospitals that are now major medical facilities, starting orphanages, training nurses, and equipping women for public ministry. And in that presentation about Elizabeth Fedde I heard again about the Deaconess Prayer, written by Wilhelm Loehe, which has now become our Deaconess Motto.
Each year the Deaconess Motto is in our assembly materials, and often will show up as a litany in worship or as a community reading in some other way. This year, as I see the words of the motto and ponder the agenda of the assembly, I am drawn to my knees in prayer. These words still reflect the yearnings of my heart as I think about being a Deaconess. Sometimes I do a better job of living this prayer than others. Sometimes we as a Community do a better job of living this prayer than others. But part of gathering is reminding ourselves–individually and collectively:
The Deaconess Motto
What do I wish? I wish to serve.
Whom do I wish to serve? The Lord, in His poor and needy ones.
And what is my reward? I do not serve either for reward or for thanks, but out of gratitude and love; my reward is that I may do this.
And if I perish in doing it? “If I perish, I perish,” said Queen Esther, who knew not Him for love of Whom I would perish; but He will not let me perish.
And if I grow old? Still shall my heart keep fresh as a palm tree, and the Lord shall satisfy me with grace and mercy.
I go in peace and free from care.
~Wilhelm Löhe