I recently heard that my dorm mom from my senior year of high school was ill and died. Even though my time in Miss Karen’s dorm was over 20 years ago, hearing about her sickness and death still affected me.
Miss Karen was my dorm mom my senior year of high school…a year that is somewhat fuzzy in my memory. I think I’ve created a narrative about that year that is likely only partially accurate. But the narrative I’ve constructed describes that year as one of significant internal angst. I had no clear vision for my future, and was exceedingly overwhelmed by the prospect of moving to the US and finding my way as an ‘adult.’ There were dynamics going on in my family that felt beyond my capacity to mediate and tend. I was cautiously making positive memories with friends, but acutely aware that with graduation came the reality that our friendships would change and likely fade. There was this overarching narrative that our lives would never be as good as they were in this moment…but so much about ‘this moment’ felt fragile, temporary, somewhat superficial, meticulously constructed and controlled.
I think when I heard about Miss Karen’s sickness and death, it brought back some of the layers of what my year in her dorm involved, as well as this lament that I did not have the connection with her that I saw others had. I watched a portion of her memorial service, and listened as people who knew Miss Karen spoke strongly about her positive influence on their lives. They spoke of her commitment to her dorm girls and the relationships with them she sustained after their time in her dorm. I know her faith and confidence in God was really important to her. She served God and the church faithfully and whole-heartedly. I know she will be missed by those who loved her.